Infinite Brightness

POV - Bill, Charlie's Teacher 
"With him life was a routine, without him life was unbearable"
- To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee

September 6, 1991

     I never thought of becoming a teacher but I do know that I have always wanted to change someone's life. I guess being a teacher does change someone's life. As a teacher you get to see the different behaviors of students. Along with watching the behaviors of students I get a glimpse of what might happen to them in the future. It is mostly my guess or prediction of their future. One of my students who I know their future clearly is, Charlie. Even though at first he wasn't doing so well in his essays I still gave him the A's on his report card because I could see the brightness in him. I am giving him books separate from the advanced english class so that he could learn on his own and so he may improve his writing in his own speed. He is only a freshmen but I know Charlie is able to build on his work if only I push him a little. I told him his sentence structure needs some more building into it. Ever since I told him that I have seen his improvement very quickly. I gave him his first B on an essay. When I gave Charlie back his graded essay on Peter Pan, he had a face of shock but elated at the same time. Then I realized that Charlie might not notice his improvement on essays. Which might make him even more proud of himself. As I have said before Charlie has an infinite future ahead of him. Do not get me wrong, during his coming-of-age story he will have some problems along the road but he will overcome it. Like when he told me about his sister being slapped by her boyfriend I knew I had to take action if Charlie would not. I just hope that there won't be any problems between her and Charlie. If there is well they can't stay mad at each other forever, right? I know I had problems with my siblings too but we always got over it. I did not think he has many friends either, until I saw him 'hang out' with some seniors, Sam and Patrick. Which makes me wonder who were his other friends in his school when he was in eighth grade. Middle school seems so much smaller than high school, so I am assuming Charlie must have had at least one friend. I am sure he did but I wonder what happened to him. My guess is that he probably moved to a different school.

October 16, 1991

    There is a certain point in our life where we all go "bad," as you would say. This happens mostly when you are a teenager. Well I never truly have gone bad. The only time I have done something bad that even my parents got mad at me would be when I slacked of on my schoolwork. Yes, I know, I lived on the wild side. I know what kind of mischief teenagers could get into, not only because I was one of them because I am a high school teacher everyday surrounded by teenagers. I do not mean snoop on someone but I accidentally overheard some students in the hallway talking about performing in a Rocky Horror Picture Show. What are these kids getting into now? I trust Charlie, that is why I told him to call me by my first name, Bill, outside of class. I am just hoping that he also will make good choices. The students who I overheard are also friends of Sam and Patrick, the seniors I mentioned earlier. If they are friends with Sam and Patrick then they must know Charlie. I don't mind them being with Charlie it's just probably one of those moments we are as teens. Teenage years are hard to grow up in. Well, that is only in my opinion because I was actually bullied when I was in school. My wife makes fun of me because of that. You could say that my wife is a bully to me sometimes but its actually just sweet teasing because of the stories I told her about my bullying experience. Charlie has already gotten in his first fight here. It was not his fault though, he was just trying to defend himself. A witness told the truth, that Charlie was only trying to defend himself. It actually turns out that he was been bullying Charlie. At least he stood up to his bully, I wish I could've done that.

November 5, 1991

     What surprised me the most about Charlie was that when he told me about his sister being slapped he asked me a very smart question. I have never thought about it but it is very true. He asked me why do we love people that are bad for us. "Charlie, we accept the love we think we deserve," was what I said, which really surprised me because I am not that kind of person to say stuff like that. I also think it is a very wise answer. I wonder how many people would agree with me because I know there are some arrogant people out there in this huge world. The reason why I am wondering this is because I know Charlie has been through a lot. Especially with what has happened to him when he was a child. Actually just last year he has been through a lot. Not that long ago one of his middle school teachers came to this school to see her students from last year. Most people from that middle school end up coming to this school. Well when she came here she told me what happened to his best friend, Michael. He committed suicide last year. Charlie is holding up great. Which also leaves me wondering about the poem he had in his notebook. I caught a glimpse of the poem in his notebook. I saw the words “slash” and “wrist” and the last line which said, “because this time he didn’t think he could reach the kitchen-”  I might be thinking about it in a wrong way but that is just my guess.

December 22, 1991

     Charlie has experienced many different things. His childhood, Michael's death, and other even more personal things. Though, his brightness never died. It kept going because I could see it in his eyes. There is no end to his brightness. When I told myself I want to change someone's life, I wanted to do something even bigger than being a teacher. We always turn out to be something we weren't expecting to be. I do not think Charlie knows what he wants to be. He sees things and he understands them. With this talent that he has, he can change many lives! When he is older I hope my prediction will come true and he will change hundreds of people’s lives. He must help them. I think the only way Charlie could do that is with a book. Just a simple book of his thoughts. Something simple and nothing, could become something. His writing has showed so much common sense and his thoughts are beautiful. I think he could write a book someday. I truly think that. He has more than potential in him than he thinks. Charlie, a normal average student. That is what you see him on the outside. Charlie, a student with infinite brightness in him. That is what he really is on the inside.

I imagined my character young because I figured he would be more understanding with Charlie.

 Here is the suicide poem  and this is the video for the poem. Enjoy!